To the editor: Just in case any of your astute readers were wondering whatever happened to this old codger, I recently returned from a monthlong visit to Lancaster County, Pennsylvania, the land of my birth and upbringing. After an absence of over 40 years, I fell in love once again with the wonderful folks in the middle of the Pa Dutch country, the scrumptious food, and the rustic Amish farms, surrounded by the remnants of William Penn’s woods. However, I was amazed at the changes and governmental intrusions into every aspect of the citizens’ daily lives. And I was totally horrified by the roads and highways, filled to the limit with speeding, tailgating, obnoxious drivers, whose favorite gesture, after a rude blast from their horn, seemed to be an obscene wave with their middle finger.
How relieved I am to return to Pleasant Valley, where “we still wave with all five fingers.” However, even here, there is a monster on the loose. After nearly unanimous public opposition to DOT’s plans to construct two roundabouts at the intersection of Chena Hot Springs Road and the Steese Expressway, the unelected borough Planning Commission is determined to shove this ridiculously expensive idea down our throats whether we like it or not. Well, after a few simple calculations, I tabulated how many times that I personally negotiated this apparently troublesome crossroad in a variety of vehicles. Through the years, give or take a weekend or two, I came up with a surprisingly exorbitant figure of way over 25,000 times, counting my daily trips to and returning from town. And do you know exactly how many problems I can recall traversing this supposedly hazardous crossing? Not a one.
Anyway, while you are cruising the side roads of Pleasant Valley, if you come across an old hippy exercising his two Rottweilers, do not be afraid to stop and chat, unless, of course, you have a couple dogs of your own in the back of your pickup. Then all bets are off, since they will probably drag him off his feet ruthlessly. And be sure to visit the Two Rivers Community Church on Sunday morning where Pastor Bob Sugden faithfully preaches the unadulterated word of God.